Friday, June 29, 2012

So much to say...

It will have to wait until another day though.

I've just run out of time. Just know... I've been meaning to write.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Important things people say

I've been trying to write down things people are saying to me lately that stick with me, or things I hear. Not things on the Internet: Facebook or Pinterest. As well meaning and nice as some of those are, I can just repin it and be done with it. This is real people saying things that inspire me or ring true. I just have to remember them now so I can share them. I have three for today. They all have stories as to how I heard them, but the stories aren't as important.

Before I write anymore, I'll just apologize for the bad sentence structure/grammar. I've been getting up early to go to the gym, and haven't quite gotten used to morning yet. I have no excuse for all the other entries with the same problem. Other than, it's my blog, I'll mistake if I want to (like the song). Also, this may take the whole morning to write, as I'm at work, and I'm actually pretty busy. Unfortunately, it's when I'm busy, that I get the urge to write about random quotes/things.

I think I'll start from the most recent and go backwards. This one came from a 4-6 year old (I have no idea how to tell the age of kids). I was at the park with my friends and their kids. (because it would be pretty weird if I was there alone.) We were playing around, as there were not a whole lot of other people there. There was monkey bars, and some other strange spinning monkey bars. They were a circle, you grab on, spin to the next one, and grab on to it... repeat repeat. I decided to try it. (even though, I can touch the ground... barely). This little boy came over to help me out. (I didn't know him). He told me how it worked, and I got ready to go. Then I asked him, "What happens if I fall?" I was expecting him to tell me it would be okay because I was landing on wood chips, and it wouldn't hurt. Instead he said, "Then you try again." I realise this analogy isn't exactly new. We've all heard it ... 'try try again'. For some reason it means more when it comes from a kid. They don't really know fear, and if they do, they shouldn't. All I'm saying, is if you need advice... go to a five year old. They'll tell you the honest truth, and won't stop to care what you've been through or why you're afraid. I feel like even though the actual task has nothing to do with the advice I got, I should share how I did... I have no upper arm strength. Lesson learned. I did make it all the way across, just had a bit of trouble with my landing.

The second bit of advice/thing that stuck with me came from a 31 year old man. I'm getting advice from children to adults. This particular advice has a story, but I'm not really going into it. Suffice to say (suffice it to say?), there was something I wanted, and wouldn't ask for it. Finally when I did, he commented and said, "Don't be shy. If you want something, take it." It's just interesting how that simplified everything. I hate asking for help, I hate asking for things, and I am much better at waiting and hoping than actually doing. Maybe it's the year for more doing, and less hoping. I'm glad that we had the conversation. He seems to know me well enough to suggest that I get over my shyness. (Or, get over myself). Anyway, that one is short and to the point.

The next one wasn't something somebody said to me. I have a friend who did a documentary about a hockey player killed in a head on collision. Obviously, car accident deaths strike a bit of a nerve (I can't even watch them on television). While speaking to one of the hockey player on the team, the player said, "Tough to have a bad day when you have a team-mate who can't play anymore." (I'm para-phrasing). Perspective from a teenager -or young adult (not sure again). I wrote that one down and put it on my desk. I've had too many bad days, when I should be having good days. All it takes is a bit of an attitude adjustment.

So... get up and try again, take what I want, and stop having bad days. Recipe to life? I think so.


Thursday, June 07, 2012


I am lucky. Some days I forget that because of the ups and downs in the past. I am lucky that I have so many great people in my life, and so many great role models.

Two of those role models are my Grandmas. My Grandma McCrea was my favourite person - hands down. Nobody could beat her, and I think I'm safe in saying a lot of people felt that way. She was always there for me, she listened to me, and gave me advice. She was a strong and confident woman. I can only hope I turn out to be like her. As I've already written about, she passed away a few years ago, and it was a devastating loss for the entire family. She lived life to the fullest, and lived a good long life full of laughter and family.

Grandma Burton was also strong. In my opinion, she did more than most woman aspired to at her age. She met my grandpa at University, and graduated with a Geology degree. I think that's pretty cool. I'm not sure how long she worked in the field, she eventually settled down on the farm with my Grandpa and did what she loved. She raised her children, and taught them how important family is. Grandma Burton never minced words. She said what she thought, and expected greatness from her kids and grand kids.  She was proud of us. Grandma is my only living grandparent, but she's had Alzheimers for a number of years, and it breaks my heart to see her lose her memories. She's still fighting though, and is still a strong and stubborn lady.

If I'm half of what these two woman were, I'm well on my way to the greatness Grandma Burton expected from me. They passed their fierceness on to the next generations.

This year, I have been lucky enough to participate in two events fighting for a cause of the diseases that have taken them from me.

My mom, my sister and I walked in "The Walk for Memories" in January this year. We raised money for it, and than walked for Alzheimer's research. I had many people support me and donate money for my cause. It made me happy, not only to be able to do it, but to have the support and back up to help me raise money and do the walk. (I am forever grateful to my support network).

On Friday, I will be doing the Relay for Life. This is my second time doing it, but I have a feeling, this one will be great. I'm walking with co-workers, and have already bought a Luminary in memory of Velma McCrea (my grandmother). Once again, so many people have donated money for my fundraising, and it just feels so good to have the help in doing this. 

These are both great tributes to two of the strongest women I know.

I'm still trying to find a way to make a tribute for Cameron. I'll know it when I find it. His family asked that donations be made to World Vision. I haven't done that yet, but will. There's got to be more though...

I don't know. Those are my thoughts for the day. I just had the need to write, so I thought I'd talk about my inspirations: Velma McCrea and Joyce Burton.

Until next time.

Friday, June 01, 2012

Super Hero Status

I was sick last week. I posted that already. I wrote on the day I was feeling most sick, and most... whiny. I was frustrated, and not just because I found out that I don't have a super hero immune system. (Although, that's still bugging me). I was upset because being sick is something I was not able to control.

Lately, I've been all about getting control in my life. I like to know what's going on with me, and I like to have a plan (if only a day at a time plan). I didn't like my weight and how I was feeling about myself, I started counting calories and going to the gym. Granted, I had already begun to lose weight before that, but I've learned a lot about how much control I have over my weaknesses. The same goes for my mood. If I'm in a bad mood, I work on getting out of it. Sometimes, it takes longer than I'd like to get that black cloud away from me, and sometimes I know I need time to feel sad, or mad, or anxious. Then, I move on. Life is just so much better when I'm happy, and knowing that makes all the difference in the world. So long story short, when I got sick, and wasn't able to get rid of it with pure will-power, sleep and vitamins, I was really frustrated.

So not quite super hero last week, but close enough this week.

I'm better now. I didn't do it on my own though. I had to get a prescription to solve my ear infection -however, it was obviously pure will-power that fixed the rest of it... it just took a week longer than I had planned.

This may be way I have such a hatred for the phrase "Everything happens for a reason." I feel as though I'm the one who makes things happen, and when it doesn't go the way I planned, it's just because crap happens. If you don't like it, change it. If you can't change it, change your outlook, and deal with it. I could go on forever about things happening for a reason, and what those reasons are, and they all sound like stupid life lessons, that have more to do with me, and not Divine intervention.

During my week of feeling sorry for myself and being sick, I wasn't able to go to the gym. This week, I've made up for it. I went for an hour on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, and loved almost every minute of it. I found it very therapeutic this week. It was a time to get lost in my thoughts and my music, and not worry about other people at all. I can't wait until Monday when I go for my next week of therapy :)

That's it. It's been the longest week ever, and I've had things going on in a lot of different areas. I've been feeling anxious about certain things, but I'm dealing with it, and if it's anything worth sharing, I will. Work has been crazy busy as well, but I'll be honest, I love the chaos!

Until next time.